Do what a cat would do. Sit between then and see what happens.

1. stand in the door way of the cat on the left. maintain eye contact and start conversating immediately with it.

2. with your right hand, make the fingers appear to be toys to the one on the right to engage his predatorial skills directly.

3. conversate with the one on the left until the one on the right is successful and draws blood.

4. then yell out loud, startling both. now, neither want anything to do with you.

er go, no more guilt / choice.