The diagnosis is always a variant of “they need some help feeling normal”.
For a substantial number of people, a full blown psychiatric diagnosis is way less useful than convincing everyone else to extend what counts as ordinary. (See: gay, trans, etc.)
Hell, for some things I’d happily settle for “harmless”. One or my stims is mouthing along to the lyrics or riffs of whatever song I’m listening to (whether because I’m actually listening to music or because my head has a 24/7 radio that tends to play a single song on repeat for hours before some random distraction makes it switch tracks), which looks like talking to myself.
I could deal people mistaking me for schizophrenic or whichever term they once heard once in some recklessly sensationalist TV incarnation of freak shows, if they didn’t also immediately associate that with “probably violent and dangerous”. I’ve been told that it’s really creepy and makes people uncomfortable. I don’t wanna scare people or make them uncomfortable.
And so I keep it in. I’ve gotten really good at that. Pretend to be normal. Fitting in, neat and proper.
I wonder why I’m all out of energy when I get home.
The diagnosis is always a variant of “they need some help feeling normal”.
For a substantial number of people, a full blown psychiatric diagnosis is way less useful than convincing everyone else to extend what counts as ordinary. (See: gay, trans, etc.)
Hell, for some things I’d happily settle for “harmless”. One or my stims is mouthing along to the lyrics or riffs of whatever song I’m listening to (whether because I’m actually listening to music or because my head has a 24/7 radio that tends to play a single song on repeat for hours before some random distraction makes it switch tracks), which looks like talking to myself.
I could deal people mistaking me for schizophrenic or whichever term they once heard once in some recklessly sensationalist TV incarnation of freak shows, if they didn’t also immediately associate that with “probably violent and dangerous”. I’ve been told that it’s really creepy and makes people uncomfortable. I don’t wanna scare people or make them uncomfortable.
And so I keep it in. I’ve gotten really good at that. Pretend to be normal. Fitting in, neat and proper.
I wonder why I’m all out of energy when I get home.