Is that the right thing to do? Or is there even a right thing to do at all?
My parents are getting old. When the time comes is going along with it the right thing to do?
My biggest fear when I get older is losing touch with reality. I prefer reality to the untethered whims of my subconscious. Do I want my family to just go along with it?
I don’t think this is the right thing to do according to psychologists. I’ve heard you’re supposed to avoid outright contradicting their reality, while also not going along with it - often by distracting them for a bit so they’ll forget what they were on about.
When I worked in memory care I found that the easiest way was to play along. I had co-workers that did their training decades before I did and they were largely attached to “reorientation in time”, which is a nice way of saying confronting their delusions, and it was just upsetting for everyone.
I don’t want to tell Doris her husband isn’t actually late coming back from the shops, or that her parents aren’t coming to pick her up, or that she doesnt need to pick up her small children from school. Wouldn’t you get upset if some random stranger insisted that your spouse, who you remember waking up next to that day, died ten years ago? Or if that random 50 year old stranger insisted that they were actually your small child that you definitely dropped off at school that morning?
Unfortunately humans aren’t capable of experiencing objective reality. Instead everything gets filtered through our brains, which even in a totally healthy state still can’t help but filter reality through a layer of subjectivity. Personally I’d pick being lied to every day over being told my life has already passed me by every day.
Whether it’s right or wrong, I feel those who “share” their “compassionate” acts on social media is just plain weird and offensive to the critical mind. True benevolent compassion does not dwell in boastfulness.
When the time comes is going along with it the right thing to do?
One thing to note is that, as far as I know, dementia is not a normal symptom of aging, so your parents and you might not have to go through it, especially if you don’t have a family history of dementia.
Is that the right thing to do? Or is there even a right thing to do at all?
My parents are getting old. When the time comes is going along with it the right thing to do?
My biggest fear when I get older is losing touch with reality. I prefer reality to the untethered whims of my subconscious. Do I want my family to just go along with it?
I don’t think this is the right thing to do according to psychologists. I’ve heard you’re supposed to avoid outright contradicting their reality, while also not going along with it - often by distracting them for a bit so they’ll forget what they were on about.
When I worked in memory care I found that the easiest way was to play along. I had co-workers that did their training decades before I did and they were largely attached to “reorientation in time”, which is a nice way of saying confronting their delusions, and it was just upsetting for everyone.
I don’t want to tell Doris her husband isn’t actually late coming back from the shops, or that her parents aren’t coming to pick her up, or that she doesnt need to pick up her small children from school. Wouldn’t you get upset if some random stranger insisted that your spouse, who you remember waking up next to that day, died ten years ago? Or if that random 50 year old stranger insisted that they were actually your small child that you definitely dropped off at school that morning?
Unfortunately humans aren’t capable of experiencing objective reality. Instead everything gets filtered through our brains, which even in a totally healthy state still can’t help but filter reality through a layer of subjectivity. Personally I’d pick being lied to every day over being told my life has already passed me by every day.
Whether it’s right or wrong, I feel those who “share” their “compassionate” acts on social media is just plain weird and offensive to the critical mind. True benevolent compassion does not dwell in boastfulness.
One thing to note is that, as far as I know, dementia is not a normal symptom of aging, so your parents and you might not have to go through it, especially if you don’t have a family history of dementia.