• jlow@slrpnk.net
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    45
    arrow-down
    2
    ·
    2 days ago

    I think the tiny “Thinks that happen” dot needs to be at least half outside of the “Thinks I worry about” circle …

    • Klear@piefed.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      10
      ·
      2 days ago

      And things that happen has to have a part outside of things that can happen, in my experience.

      • Apathy Tree@lemmy.dbzer0.com
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        1 day ago

        Yeah this whole things needs to be shifted toward the unanticipated because IME, the things i worry about have zero to do with the bad things I experience.

        You cant really prepare for the actual things that matter. Might as well not worry. Life is chaotic.

        Optimism sounds hard when life gets difficult, but really its just recognizing that in the grand scheme of things, nothing matters but what you experience, so everything thats good is really good. The bad stuff still sucks, but we’ve always had bad, and we’ve always had good, and its all just what its going to be, in our deterministic universe. And thats OK. If you want to see the good, you can, even if it takes some effort, and thats great.

        I used to think i was a pessimist, but that was wrong, because i always expect the best of any situation. These days they call that hope or copium, but its optimism. I never actually expect things to suck, i hope for the best and let myself be disappointed by people, because to me, thats emotionally easier than expecting the worst all the time. People aren’t bad, they have bad motivations as a result of our broken antisocial systems. And it helps to remember that we survived thousands of years without the present level of conflict, because the vast majority of us, historically and presently, don’t want this shit.

    • Otter@lemmy.ca
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      2
      ·
      2 days ago

      There’s also the set of things that I’m not worried about --> things that happen anyway

  • Scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.tech
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    17
    ·
    2 days ago

    Took therapy for me to realize it. They said “You view the world in very binary terms, this will or won’t happen. You are anxious over things like they either will or won’t happen. The world though, isn’t binary. It’s very analog. Focusing on the worst possible outcome is to focus on one out of infinite possibilities that could happen in between. Is it possible? Sure. But it’s not probable that the worst case will happen. Reality and history prove that it’s usually somewhere in between the best and worst cases”

    That there just clicked it with me, and made me realize that I had been focusing on the worst case. For me the trigger is climate change, and I used to have to turn off the news to avoid it. Therapy helped, and taught me that while the worst could happen, there are infinite number of outcomes to such a complex problem, and that me panicking over the worst possible case isn’t going to help, and it’s probably not even going to happen.

    And it turns out I’ve been right. For that one trigger, there have been changes on both the best and worst cases. The US is going down a very horrid path, but the rest of the world is starting to turn the tide. Solar is only getting better. We’re backwards here, but it’s not backwards everywhere. The absolute worst case scenario probably won’t happen. It’ll probably be somewhere in between best and worst cases.

    • passepartout@piefed.socialOP
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      6
      ·
      2 days ago

      As time progresses we go further down a decision tree, although not binary as we have a plethora of choices in each node. The best part is that we can make a cut at any time and the tree will fan out again so we can still get back on track to reach most of the end nodes. Nothing is ever lost and nothing will stay the way it is right now forever as well. Best of luck.

    • BCsven@lemmy.ca
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      2 days ago

      This is why I like our Socialized Car Insurance in BC, Canada.

      Everyone has same insurer.

      The prices are set and you have a discount based on years of driving.

      You get in an accident, you send details in online, as does the other party.

      You both get your car fixed.

      If its not a massive accident with severe industries, you don’t even call the police…they don’t come even if you did, because there is no need.

        • BCsven@lemmy.ca
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          1 day ago

          No. And sometimes the at fault persons premiums dont either

          For situations where fault can be attributed to another party they have a slider like 0% 25%, 50%,75% 100% etc. This determines whose coverage is being used (even though the money comes from the pool).

          As you have accidents/traffic claim related issues your years of driving bracket it slid toward a lower discount. So with 10+ years driving you are in the biggest discount, if you had various issues it may be enough to drop you to the lower brackets and discount is reduced till you gain additional years to move you up the scale again…like +1 modifiers in DnD lol.

          For example. My wife was heading straight at a 2 way stop with a through road, driver opposite was turning left. By law she had right of way and started to cross the through road, but opposite driver was eager to pull out to beat through traffic. The driver hit the front side of my wife’s car. We filed online, so did other party. There were no traffic cams or dash cams. The insurers claim adjuster reviewed and actually pushed fault onto my wife citing a law that if a left turner is already into the intersection then the right turner has to yield till its clear. We thought it was bullshit review based on situation and could take it to the tribunal. But our cars got fixed “for free” and we had a rental car given to us. And based on driving history our rates stayed the same. So fighting it wasn’t worth the effort.

          Then since we had COVID pandemic the rates dropped and we got rebate cheques because they weren’t paying out as many accidents as they anticipated.

          • Upperhand@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            1
            ·
            22 hours ago

            That sounds like a good system. Here in quebec, it’s no fault insurance. It doesn’t matter who causes the accident. If you make a claim to fix your car because the other person: ran a stop or lost a tire and it hits your car or whatever other incident occurs, as per my first hand exprience with multiple insurers and even automotive or commercial, your premiums go up until it falls off your record after, I think, seven years.

            • BCsven@lemmy.ca
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              1
              ·
              22 hours ago

              Yeah, I think its one of the better systems, it is run as a crown corporation nonprofit. Years back people with exotic cars were getting enormously Hugh damage repaired for normal premiums, but they changed that more recently so if your car is more than $150k purchase price you have to pay additional premium to cover higher damages cost.

              • Upperhand@lemmy.world
                link
                fedilink
                arrow-up
                2
                ·
                20 hours ago

                That’s very reasonable, if you can afford that kind of car, you can afford addiontal coverage. For the people who cry about it, I find a good piece of advice when getting an expensive car is that if you can’t afford two of them, you can’t afford one.

  • Marternus@discuss.tchncs.de
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    2
    ·
    2 days ago

    Two big circles with an intersection would make more sense. Things that happen are naturally just a dot, but that doesn’t mean it was not likely to happen. It just didn’t.

    • lemonwood@lemmy.ml
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      2
      ·
      2 days ago

      Wish he had had that thought earlier and stayed this calm, when his slaves were freed instead of staging an insurrection with help from the CIA to get them back. On the other hand, he could have been less nonchalant and impulsive that other time were he decided to molest a child live in front of a camera.

      Edit; it’s still a good quote, but many had the same idea and the person it’s attributed to here is problematic

    • brunchyvirus@fedia.io
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      2 days ago

      or a rogue black hole flying through the solar system, or the universe is in a false vacuum, or that youreot really the biological version of yourself and you’re really just a Boltzmann brain in space.